Hilbre's Life Coaching Blog

You can count on me like 123…

I love the song Count on Me by Bruno Mars. It makes me feel good and I think about my friends when I listen to it. I think about how they support me and I look at how I support them and what I can do to be a better friend. We are all so busy today (too busy in fact), but that just seems to be the speed the world is moving at right now. A close friend who is going through a really tragic time said to me that she doesn’t feel like anyone has really been there for her. A client said to me that her friend just doesn’t seem to have time for her anymore.

What is friendship?

What does ‘being there’ for a friend mean?

Who will you call when you need a friend?

Who do you think will call you – will you be there when they do call?

I am reading a really interesting book called ‘Is That All There Is?’ by Julia Neuberger who is a female Jewish Rabbi. She talks about Facebook and what the term ‘friends’ means. I always find it fascinating how many people seem to have so many ‘friends’ and yet they seem inherently lonely. Are we deluding ourselves that we have a support group because we are all connected online? What happens when we actually need people to give of their time and to be there to do things for us – things that take time and can’t be done in a few minutes on Facebook, Twitter, MSN and the rest….

Count how many friends you really do have – they always say if you can count them on one hand you are rich in friendship. If you have more than 5 really true friends then know you are lucky and remember to make time for them as true friendship is pretty special.

Now go and enjoy Bruno Mars.

I have just got back from a wonderful break in the warmth and beauty of Indonesia. I find holidays are a great time to get perspective on one’s life.

PERSPECTIVE is one of the most powerful aspects of coaching. We all view our lives in a certain way and that perspective is often seen as our reality. What if we can change our perspective, can we then change the way we view our world? The answer is absolutely.

I believe what sets positive people apart from those who see the glass as half empty is they choose a positive energy-enhancing perspective, no matter what card life deals them. While we can’t change the essence of our reality – if we are going through a particularly challenging time in our lives we can’t just make the experience go away, but we can choose the way we see it. We always have a choice in how we view our world and people often forget this.

The coaching process assists in exploring different perspectives on what ever issue or challenge we are facing. From there we can choose the perspective we think will serve us best, and from that place we can look at what resources are available to us that will give us strength and confidence to move forward.

I am back in my reality now and know most of you are in yours as you read this, but remember you can always choose what perspective you want to be in. Life really is all about CHOICE and you don’t have to wait to go on holiday to get perspective, you can do it anywhere, anytime.

Try this simple exercise next time you are in a restaurant – switch places with the person opposite you and notice how different your experience is. The essence of your reality is still the same – you are both eating in the same restaurant, at the same time, at the same table but just by changing your outlook you will see the restaurant differently and notice things you hadn’t seen before.